And so they climbed the seventh
mountain; and six mountains they climbed first, and each was more arduous than the last, and so they made it to they seventh mountain, and on top of that mountain were the seven mystics, and the seventh mystic
could tell you what you really sought, and what your life was meant for, and then you could stand in the ice and
not freeze, and in the fire and not melt.
And then there was the eighth
mountain. And a lot of people who couldn't scale the seventh looked over and saw the eighth, which was lower, and some people who were halfway
up the seventh just told themselves “Screw it - I'm going to the eighth."
When they got there there was no charge to get in, and you didn't learn anything about your life but there were lots of board games. The seventh mountain people looked down on them (literally), but on Mount 8 you did not have to put stickers on the back of your car indicating how many mountains you'd climbed, and in general if you promised not to hurt other people, you could stay. If you could not live by that rule, you got exiled to the seventh. See, that mountain was punishment for some.